50+ Best Cool Instagram Bios & Quotes Ideas

1. Light travels faster than sound… That’s why people appear bright until they speak.
2. Never try to teach a pig to sing- it wastes your time and annoys the pig.
3. Making history.
4. Eat…sleep…regret……repeat.
5. A man of mystery and power, whose power is exceeded only by his mystery.
6. Insert pretentious stuff about myself here.
7. I’m here to avoid friends on Facebook.
8. I will win, not immediately but definitely.
9. How we live our life is far more important than how we say we live our life.
10. Everybody wishes they could go to heaven but no one wants to die.
11. Chocolate doesn’t ask questions, chocolate understands.
12. Probably the best meat eater in the world.
13. Things just ain’t the same for gangstas.
14. My relationship status? Netflix, Oreos and sweatpants.
15. You’re too rad to be sad.
16. Silent people have the loudest minds.
17. Oh I’m sorry was my sass too much for you?
18. Just another paper cut survivor.
19. I only use Instagram to stalk…
20. I’m not glad it’s “Friday”, I’m glad it’s “Today”. Love your life – 7 days a week.
21. If I delete your number, you’re basically deleted from my life.
22. Why would I ever leave the house when there’s Netflix and ice cream waiting for me.
23. A Caffeine dependent life-form.
24. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.
25. I’ve always thought being popular on Instagram is as about as useless as being rich in monopoly.
26. Why look up at the stars when the biggest star is me.
27. A human. Being.
28. If opportunity doesn’t knock, build a door.
29. Please insert pretentious crap about myself here.
30. You will never have anything you don’t respect, including lot’s of money.
31. “F#%K It.” – my final thought before making most decisions.
32. Phones are better than girlfriends, at least we can switch them off.
33. Life is dumb and I want to sleep.
34. Never argue with an idiot they’ll drag you down to their level and beat you through experience
35. The road to success is always under construction.
36. I haven’t been myself ever since I was born.
37. I do yoga sometimes, drink sometimes, party sometimes, and study rarely.
38. The only person on Instagram who doesn’t claim to be a social media guru.
39. I can’t remember who I stole my bio from or why.
40. Living vicariously through myself.
41. I have this new theory that human adolescence doesn’t end until your early thirties.
42. Some people need to open their small minds instead of their big mouths.
43. I’m real and I hope some of my followers are too.
44. If you don’t have anything nice to say, come sit by me, and we can make fun of people together.
45. We are all part of the ultimate statistic – ten out of ten die.
46. If people are talking behind your back, be happy that you are the one in front.
47. Someday, there’s going to be an updated version of me.
48. You can’t fix stupid, no matter how much duct tape you use over their mouth!
49. Time is precious, waste it wisely.
50. I’m starting to like Instagram, which is weird because I hate pictures.
51. We live in a society were pizza gets to your house before police.
52. Hey, you are reading my bio again?!
53. God bless this hot mess.
54. Everybody is so happy… I hate that.
55. This isn’t rocket science, you take a photo of brunch and you hashtag #yolo #sundayfunday.
56. The best of me is yet to come.
57. You have to learn the rules of the game. And then you have to play better than anyone else.
58. I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I am joking.
59. A book-store is only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.
60. I think it’s weird if a girl doesn’t have an Instagram now days.
61. Words cannot express my love & passion for Fridays!
62. Stay classy.
63. Scratch here ▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒▒ to reveal my bio
64. Life is short… Smile while you still have teeth.

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